high school musical fanfiction fame
By:Zac is my.Life
Rated: Fiction M – English – Romance/Family – Troy B., Gabriella M. – Chapters: 36 – Words: 328,090 – Reviews: 350 – Favs: 135 – Follows: 120 – Updated: 2/9/2015 – Published: 2/2/2014 – Status: Complete – id: 10077805
Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten
Chapter 34 – Single Mom
Saturday, January 18th, 2020
Cam ran down the court with the ball bouncing as high as his waist until he made it to the other end. He passed the ball off to a teammate and then back around again. Jack stood on the sideline coaching Cam because he finally found somebody that would play basketball.
Troy leaned forward as he tipped Logan’s car seat forward, his eyes watching her, as she was asleep from the ruckus in the gym. Her hand moved and rubbed her face but then fell back to her side as she continued to sleep.
Lilly was situated on my lap and was talking a mile a minute about school and everything that was going on to the point I had a headache but I let her continue because there wasn’t much of this time that we had together.
This week there may be more than any of us would like with Troy getting ready to leave for a two-week caravan. I was invited to tag along but I didn’t want to drag Logan around the Midwest with all of the germs that were flying around. It was going to be interesting to see how it was going to go without Troy around to help me but we would make it work.
“Atta boy Cam!” My dad yelled from behind me on the bleachers, I focused back in on the game and Cam was setting up on the free-throw line. I leaned closer to Troy, my chin resting on his shoulder. “I’m really glad you are a baseball player.” Troy smiled, “Yea?” I nodded, “Yea,” he squeezed my knee and Jack got frustrated with a call. Troy laughed, “That is my dad,”
“I have seen that face before.” I told him, my dad chuckled from behind, “Really, where?”
“You, you dork.” Troy grinned, “I barely look like him!”
“You are a spitting image of your father. You make the same face when you are angry.”
Troy reached over to tickle me but Logan screeched out at the same time. “Saved by Logan,” Troy rolled his eyes as he steadied her car seat, then he began to remove her from the harness. “Let me see her,” my mom said who was sitting next to Troy. “By all means,” Troy gave Logan up and my mom took over. “I think it is almost time for another sleepover,” my mom said, “Yes, grandma misses you,”
“I would say tonight but I leave in two days so that isn’t going to happen.”
“I expect to see more of my daughter this week,” my dad said as he rubbed his shoulder, I laughed, “Whatever. Who said I would come to your house?”
“You always come to our house when Troy leaves.”
“Wow, this fight sounds so familiar.” Troy said, we all laughed as we watched Cam continue to work the court. Lilly ended up in Troy’s lap while we watched the game. Logan fell back asleep in my mom’s arms and we were content on not moving her. I leaned into Troy with a yawn as I thought back to our last week in Missouri. It was cold like usual and the weather was bleak.
Logan did really well on the flight home from St. Thomas, she pretty much slept the entire way back and Ben did the same. Troy reached over for my knee again and I smiled towards him. My head rested on his shoulder and Lilly still was chattering away about life. “Lil, I don’t even think your sister is listening anymore.” I pulled my head up, “Huh?”
“Long night with Lo?” I nodded as I rested my head down again, “Yea, she was fussy last night.”
“Is that why she is so tired today?” my mom asked, I nodded my head, “Probably.”
Lilly climbed off Troy’s lap and he eased me into his lap, my head rested on his shoulder while I tried to stay awake but I was exhausted. I wanted to take a nap but I promised Cam I would come to his game today. Logan began to chirp next to us and I looked over at her. She was smiling and covering her face with her hands. “She is going to be awake for the rest of the day.”
“You can take a nap. You were up with her most of the night.” Troy said kissing on my temple. “Aren’t you such a gentlemen,”
My mom was playing with Logan when the final buzzer ran out. Cam’s team won and they jumped up and down with excitement. I got up from Troy’s lap while my mom and him put Logan back into her car seat. “She might just throw a fit.” Troy muttered Cam came running up the stairs as I greeted him in a big hug. “Good job big guy!”
“Thanks! I had a lot of fun.”
“Good,” I rubbed his hair and he went to my dad. They high-five and Jack came over to peek at Logan who was calm with being buckled into the car seat. “Cam, thank you for playing basketball,”
“No problem Jack,” they high fived each other as well. Troy and Jack talked for a minute while I hugged my dad back. “I’ll see you Monday?”
“Shut up,” he laughed, “What, I would love to spend time with you and my granddaughter.”
“I bet you would.”
He laughed squeezing my shoulders with a smile; Troy poked my stomach, “Are you ready?”
“Let’s go,” I picked up Logan’s car seat and Troy grabbed the diaper bag. “We’ll see you guys soon,”
“Be safe on the caravan!”
“Will do, I bet you’ll see Gabi,”
“I know how to take care of myself,” I said in annoyance, “You love your parents too much Brie,”
“I love you!” my dad called, “Love you too,”
Troy caught up with me and his hand went to the small of my back, “I’m joking around.”
“Briee,” he sang my name in a song as he unlocked the car. I settled Logan inside in her holder, it clicked into place and I made sure she was in there good and tight. I shut the door and Troy was waiting there. “Brie,”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you upset.” I rubbed my face and I rested against him. “I’m mostly tired.” Logan had been really fussy the past couple of nights sleeping and Troy and I were taking turns with her. I wasn’t napping during the day and it was all catching up on me. Troy wrapped his arms around me, “I know, naps are due when we get home.”
“Feedings are due when I get home.”
He reached in for a kiss and I felt my cheeks burn once his lips touched them. “I love you,”
“I love you too,”
Monday, January 20th, 2020
“I’m going to miss you sweet girl, yes, I am going to miss you so much.” Troy was kissing all over Logan as I finished packing one of his bags. He tickled her stomach and she drew her feet up close to her with another giggle. “I promise to call every night and we can FaceTime so I can see you precious face.” Logan rolled on her back while I sat down on edge of the bed.
Troy looked up and he then scooped Logan into his arms. He kissed on her some more before laying her in the swing near by. “I will definitely miss you,” he whispered into my ear as he crawled closer to me. I couldn’t resist the smile that was playing at the corner of my lips, “Troy,”
“Troy it is two weeks, I will be fine.”
“I know you’ll be fine but two weeks is such a long time,”
“Compared to our eleven back in college?” Troy cringed slightly, “I would rather not think about that.” I laughed bring him down into a kiss, “We did it though,” his thumb stroked my face gently and I wrapped my fingers around his wrists. “Troy, what was your first thought when I broke up with you,” Troy’s body stiffened over top of me and he pulled away, I tightened my grip on his wrists.
“Why are we even bring this up?” he asked me, “Because, I sometimes wonder. I have dreams about it sometimes at night and the look on your face will forever haunt me in my dreams.” Troy sighed as he rolled onto his side; he laid flat on his back. I leaned over to rest my head onto his chest, his heart beating back into my ear. “You want to know my exact first thought?” Troy said, I nodded, “Your first thought…”
Troy went quiet for a moment, “To run.”
“To chase after you and to block your path. I didn’t want you to walk away, I had no desire to let you walk away and when you turned to look back at me it was like my legs shattered from underneath of me. My chest like exploded and I saw your first and I knew I had to give you space. I understood that I needed to give you space because you were upset. You were so upset and I just want to comfort you.”
I rubbed his arm as I kissed his cheek, “You gave me space.”
“I gave you a shit ton of space,”
“Did you want to come find me that day?”
“I wanted to go two hours later.”
A laugh escaped my lips; “I was pretty much in the air two hours later,”
“I know. I found Dylan and talked to him two hours later.”
“What?” I sat up to look at him, he smiled, and “Do you really think I just gave up on you like that. Dylan talked me off the ledge that night, as I pretty much was a blubbery baby, sitting in a Royals office with Dylan and Cody. They told me that we needed to have some space and that I had a bright future ahead of me. They told me to give it some time and that you were scared. Dylan told me you went off to New York to see your dad already and that you were gone.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck, “Guess what, they were right.” He smiled as he leaned in for a kiss. “And we have a beautiful daughter and a big beautiful house and a bright future ahead of us.”
Troy kissed me again and I pressed my face into his neck, “I am going to miss you.”
“When was the last time we were apart for two weeks?” I questioned, Troy shrugged, and “I have no idea it has been a while though.”
“I am pretty sure we aren’t going to make it.” Troy laughed, “I think we are going to make it.”
I sat up on the bed and Troy rubbed my shoulders gently, he then kissed my cheek. “I have to get ready to go.”
“I know, I know, Logan doesn’t want you to leave.”
“If I could smuggle Logan with me I totally would.”
“If you could protect all diseases away from your daughter I will completely let you.” Troy chuckled; Logan made a noise from her swing. Troy and I both looked over there to see her trying to get her foot closer to her mouth. Troy reached for his phone while he snapped a picture of her. He smiled, “She is so beautiful Gabs,”
“Can you believe we did that?”
“I actually can. We have had some fantastic practice sessions,” I busted out laughing, “Troy,”
“Don’t ruin the moment,”
“How did I ruin the moment?”
He smiled and he kissed me again, “I’ll forever ruin the moment Gabs,”
“I know you will, you goob,”
I rocked Logan in the chair gently while I tried to get her to fall asleep but she seemed to be protesting such matters. I tucked her blanket in tighter around her body as she turned her head fighting off sleep. “Logi,” I whispered, I rubbed her back gently as it had been seven hours without Troy home. I was completely happy with Logan with us and I loved having her with me.
This made it a lot easier to see Troy go, knowing I had Logan. Skip was curled up by my feet in all efforts to keep close, as I rocked Logan to sleep. “Why are you protesting? Huh?” she let a small cry and I rested her head onto my shoulder. My fingers rubbed her back up and down; I couldn’t believe she was getting closer and closer to be being three months old. It was mind-blowing.
She rubbed her eyes and started to cry again. “Baby girl,” I whispered into her ear while she screamed, I adjusted her in my arms again, her face scrunched up tightly with tears. Reaching over, I flipped on her sound machine and she began to quiet a little bit. “I know, normally if you cry like this you get daddy for a little bit.” I stroked her hair gently and she began to fall asleep. Her fight inside of her gave up as I rocked her back and forth.
Troy and I had decided that Alyssa was going to be her nanny throughout the season and she was more than excited to start in April. We didn’t even meet with Sophia again because Alyssa passed with flying colors. She never really had her phone out and or anything. All of her attention was on Logan from the beginning to the end. I fell in love with her and Troy liked her as well.
I had asked her to come in later this week to watch Logan for a bit while I helped out with FanFest stuff for most of the day. I would take her the following to oversee the set up on Thursday. Logan fell asleep with her hand attached to my shirt. I loved the moments with Logan like this, the way she would just lay against me with no worries in the world. After another fifteen minutes I eventually got up from the rocker and I rested her into the crib.
Quietly making my way out of the room I went downstairs to wash dishes and switch the laundry over. Skip jumped onto the counter in the laundry room and I ran my fingers through his hair. He brushed up against me his body vibrating with satisfaction that he was getting some love. “C’mon big guy, we are going to go pump and then go to bed.” Skip followed me up the stairs while I got my breast pump and everything situated.
I grabbed a book from the nightstand but I decided to call Troy instead. The first thing I heard when he answered the phone was his laugh followed by a bunch of boys. He was in the same bus as Moose, Gordon, Yost, Finnegan, and Cain. They were probably all having a bawl of a time as well. “Hey babe,”
“How did Logan’s bed time go?”
“Okay, she was fighting sleep the entire time and just wanted to cry for most of it. She finally gave up and we cuddled for another twenty minutes.” Troy sighed, “Damn, I love cuddle time.”
“Troy boy missing out on cuddles,”
“With Logan,” he corrected, “Hey!”
Troy laughed, “And Gabi,”
“There is the man,” Troy laughed, “Did the rest of the day go okay?”
“Perfectly fine. We went to Ellie’s book store and hung out for a bit and then we got some dinner before coming home for the evening.”
“Sounds like my ladies had a good day,”
“We did indeed, how was your first stop?”
“Fantastic. Plenty of people excited about this upcoming season.”
“Good, they should be. I think you guys are going to have an even better season this year.”
“I sure hope so.”
I adjusted the breast pump and I let out a long yawn, “I’m kind of mad that you won’t be here for the three am feeding, you keep me awake.” Troy chuckled, “You can call me.”
“No, it’s your time away. You deserve some time off.”
“And when do you get time off?” he questioned, I smiled, “When I take a week vacation after we are done breast feeding,” Troy laughed, “Agreed,”
“I am going to go, I just wanted to say good-night as I finished pumping,”
“Good night babe, I’ll talk to you tomorrow morning.”
“I love you,”
“Love you too baby girl,”
Wednesday, January 22nd, 2020
I smiled for one of the pictures and the young kid turned around after the flash. “Thank you so much Mr. Bolton!” I cringed and Moose laughed next to me because my least favorite thing in the world is being called Mr. Bolton. I only had flashbacks of my father during high school and I didn’t really want that. “You’re welcome big guy!” he grinned and took off running to his mom.
I waved while the next kid came through, “Mr. Bolton, is it true that you have a baby now?” I was taken by surprise about this question from a maybe ten-year-old boy. “I did, I have a little girl,” the mom behind me grinned, “How old is she now?” the mom asked, “She’ll be three months on the 5th,” I winced saying it, “Wow, I can’t believe how big she is getting already.”
The mom laughed, “It’s amazing isn’t it?” she pointed to her son in front of me, “How old are you?” I asked him, “Seven!” he said, he held up all of his fingers and I couldn’t help but smile. “What’s your name?” I asked, “Jason,” I took his baseball as I wrote his name on the baseball, “Jason, if you are ever at the game stand behind the dugout and drop this ball to one of the players and I will come out and say hi, all right?” Jason grinned, “Thank you Mr. Bolton!”
“It’s Troy,” I told him, he smiled and walked off, “Thank you Troy,” I nodded to the mother, I then reached out to shake her hand. “I mean it, if he brings it I’ll come out to see him.”
“Thank you,” I nodded, as the line kept moving, I signed more baseballs and took more pictures until the line ended. I stood up to stretch and Gordon gave me a water bottle. “Thanks,”
“Is Logan really going to be three months one the 5th?” I nodded my head, “She is. Isn’t that scary?”
“Time flies. I remember when my two were that little.”
“Gabi text me this morning of pictures of her smiling and a video of her giggly. She is always so happy.”
“Royals are letting you bring her on the planes?”
“For now. If it gets too complicated or she doesn’t handle it well then Gabi and Logan will take a separate flight with our nanny.”
“Hope our younger boys are ready for a single nanny,” I laughed, “She is cute but that is all I will say about that. She is actually older than I am.”
“Is Gabi ready to get back into work?”
“I think she is secretly excited for FanFest.”
I took a long drink of my water while I flexed my hand open and shut. “Damn autographs,”
“Here you cry baby,” Finnegan hit me with a bag of ice and I laughed, “I didn’t say I needed ice.”
“You are a pitcher. You use ice for everything.”
Moose walked over as we all began to talk about several different things and my phone vibrated in my back pocket. I pulled my phone out of my pocket while I saw a text from Gabi. I opened the message to see a picture of Logan, she was curled up in Gabi’s arms wearing a Royals shirt with a Royal’s tutu, “You guys,” I said, I turned my phone around and they all melted.
“Bolton, you better prepare. She is beautiful,”
“I know, my goodness, I’m quite upset that I am not home right now.”
“I would be too. She does look happy.”
“Girl’s night!” Ellie yelled as the door pushed the door open to my house, Mallory and I shared a glance with each other as Ellie brought in two bottles of wine and was dragging all of her stuff into the house. Logan was sitting up in my lap and Audrey was laying and rolling around on the floor.
“Did you bring two bottles of wine for yourself?” Mallory said, Audrey looked up at Ellie and she frowned, “No,”
“Then why did you bring two bottles?”
Her face fell, “Why are you guys not drinking?”
“I have a baby feed…” I said pulling Logan’s arms around, “You aren’t breastfeeding still so what is your excuse?”
“I’m going home late. I have a work meeting in the morning.”
Ellie pouted while she sat down on the couch, “I want a baby,” she looked between Audrey and Logan before crawling onto the floor with Audrey. Audrey giggled and Ellie began to play peek-a-boo with the five-month old. My legs bounced up and down with Logan on them as she was playing with her hands resting against me. She was becoming stronger and holding her head up a little bit more but she still liked to sleep more than anything.
“How is your life without Troy?”
“Boring.” I muttered, “Logan makes it entertaining for a while and then she sleeps and then I am left with nothing to do. My house is clean from top to bottom, I am caught up on laundry and the dish washer has literally two things in it.”
“I wish I had that time.” Mallory said leaning back, “Audrey is becoming fussy when I am not holding her but I have to sleep during the day for work at night so she is spending the morning at daycare and then I go get her in the afternoon. Spend time with her and then I am off to work again once Colin gets home for work. I don’t remember the last time I did laundry.” She rolled her eyes, “Colin does it when he gets home.”
“Colin does laundry?” Ellie said in shock, “Yea, why?”
“I can’t get Chase to even try. He drops his suits off at the dry cleaners once a week and that is what he calls laundry.” Mallory laughed, “Colin wishes he could do that sometimes.”
“How often do you see Colin?”
“Like every other day.” She sighed, “With my working schedule and his working schedule we see each other maybe four hours in forty-eight.”
“You guys need a date night.”
“That’s what I said but our schedules just don’t work out.”
“Make them work out. Can you move to weekends?” I questioned, Ellie nodded in agreement and Mallory sighed, “I put in for it but nothing is coming back from the office. I sent them an email this morning actually about it. I would work Friday, Saturday, and Sunday every week so I would only have to worry about Friday’s but there goes my social life.”
“Not like any of us have set schedules either.”
“I only work in the summer,”
“I work whenever I want,” Ellie said, she laughed, “What about Becca and Alex?”
“They get summers off and are normally open to going out on a weeknight as long as it isn’t too late.”
“So you are telling me I could still have a social life?”
“You could indeed,”
“Friday night games though,”
“You can take off every now and then or do Saturday, Sunday, Monday so you have Friday nights off. You can go to games and have a night for a social life.”
“That’s a good idea. I’ll have to run that by my supervisor and see if we could swing it.”
“I think that is the best idea out of all of them.”
Audrey began to cry, as Ellie was no longer paying attention to her. I turned Logan in my arms and she cried because she couldn’t see anything anymore. “I know, I know,” I went over to her swing to lay her inside. Buckling her in I kissed her forehead as I gave her a toy to mess around with. Mallory picked up Audrey as she set her up with some toys and she sat up like a big girl to play with all of them.
“What do you guys want for dinner?”
“Man, I miss Chinese that delivers.” Mallory said, “Like I really miss it.”
“There are just certain things you can’t replace about New York.”
“I miss it.”
“Those four years were the best.”
“Those were some of the hardest times you have had.” Ellie said looking at me, I shrugged, “So, they were some of the best times when they weren’t a struggle. My junior and senior year was the best.”
“After that ESPN thing your junior year you were Ms. Popular on campus.” I grinned, “Troy absolutely hated that. He got so damn jealous of everybody and when he left for Spring Training,”
“I have never seen jealousy so big,” I rolled my eyes, as he was Mr. Superstar by then anyways. He was in his second year of the big leagues and I was his ESPN girlfriend. Many of them were jealous that my boyfriend was in the majors. “That was a lot of fun.”
“The apartment was always fun.”
“It was like a big episode of Friends.”
“I’ll never forget when Zach walked in on you and Troy having sex,” Ellie said, her laugh blossoming out of her mouth. Mallory fell forward in laughter as my cheeks turned completely red in embarrassment. “Oh Jesus,” the two girls were dying in laughter while I shook my head, “I will never forget that,”
“Zach completely flipped out. Oh my god, I have never seen him flip out like that.”
“That was right after he started dating Alex and she was mad that he was living in New York.”
“I have never heard a male scream so loud.”
“I can’t believe he was the horrified,”
“I can’t believe he overlooked the tie on the bedroom door,” I clarified, “It wasn’t like we didn’t try to tell you,”
“We all knew. Zach just came flying through the living room and straight into the room.” I laughed trying to picture all of this in my head. “Our group was something else in college and now we ware all married and having kids.” I said with a sigh, “What happened?” I laughed and I shook my head, “No clue.”
“You and Troy are still horny as hell. Josh is actually married. Zach isn’t flirting with me anymore. Mallory you are a mom and are getting married with college sweetheart and I married Chase who has no idea what Time Square was until he met me.”
“I miss it but I also love my little girl,” I said, my eyes drifted over to Logan who was half-asleep in her swing. “We had to grow-up at some point right?”
None of us said anything for a while, “Right.” I finally whispered our eyes all connected while we thought of the past that seemed so long ago when it was only three years ago.
Thursday, January 23rd, 2020
The doorbell rang overhead as I cursed; I threw my hair up into a messy bun as I ran down the hallway to the front door. Logan was currently napping, allowing me to get ready.
Unlocking the door, I composed myself; swinging it open I gave a smile to Alyssa. “Hi!” I cheered, “How are you?”
“I am great, how are you?”
“Fantastic. I get to go do some work for a little bit so that kind of makes me happy.” Alyssa smiled softly as she kicked off her shoes and put down her bag. “Logan is currently asleep upstairs. I am going to go finished getting ready and I’ll grab her for you. Make yourself at home,”
“Awesome,” she wondered into the living room and I went back upstairs. I glanced in the mirror and I cringed. Half of my make-up was on my face and the other half was completely blank. My shorts were a little baggy around the top and my tank top etched up. Logan and I had cuddled for a while longer than I remembered as the time was crunched.
Alyssa must have thought I was a drama queen for getting ready like this. I shook my head as I went back to finishing my make-up quickly. I then pulled on my dress pants with a blue blouse. I couldn’t actually believe all of my clothes from last year fit. The baby weight had just disappeared quickly and I enjoyed it because I didn’t have much time for working out.
I put on my necklace that Troy got me for Christmas with my Michael Kors watch. Digging through my closet I found my black heels to wear along with my black purse. This was the first time I had gotten dressed up and not gone to a wedding.
Shame no alcohol.
Shutting off all of the lights in the bedroom, I shut the door and then moved into Logan’s room. She was still asleep so I decided to leave her. I picked up her baby monitor taking it downstairs to Alyssa.
She turned around at the sound of my heels clicking against the floor; I offered a smile as I set my bag down next to the door. “She is still sleeping right now. She shouldn’t be asleep for too much longer.” Alyssa nodded her head as I spoke, “She will want a bottle when she wakes up and there is five in the fridge. Any of them work. I left her schedule on the counter like last time, you have my phone number correct?”
“Yes, I have Troy’s also.”
“Only use him if you have a complete emergency. He is doing a signing in Iowa City,” I said with a smile, “If you can’t get ahold of me then call this number,” I walked into the kitchen as I wrote down my office number. “IF that fails, which it shouldn’t, call my mom.”
“Besides that it is a pretty simple day. I should be home by five tonight.”
I nodded as I tucked my hair behind my ears; Troy wasn’t here to push me out of the door this time. I had to work up the courage to do. Could I do it? My eyes glanced at the clock as I fidgeted wondering if I could call Troy right now to make him talk me out of the door.
Alyssa looked at me expecting more and I shook my head, “That should be it. Like I said, any questions don’t be afraid to text or call me.”
“Got it,” I walked into the room to grab my purse as I put my keys and wallet inside. I then grabbed my laptop bag.
“Have fun!” I cheered; she nodded as she took her seat back down onto the couch. She pulled out books from her bag as she had told us that she was doing some college classes online to get her masters degree.
Opening the door, I took the first step out, shut the door, and then was quickly calling Troy. 90% of my body wanted to walk back into the room the other 10% was glad I could go work for a couple of hours.
“Make me leave this house,” I said quickly, “Because 90% of my wants to stay with Logan,”
“That is a large percent,” Troy said, “Troy, you need to help me. Normally you kick me out by your foot and I am having to make my own feet do it!” I whined, Troy laughed, “Brie, Logan will be perfectly fine. Your gut said Alyssa and you know she will be okay. It’s for what…” he paused, “Six hours?”
“Seven,” I mumbled, “She is going to be fine. You are more than welcome to call in whenever you want.” Troy’s voice was so soothing and I took a deep breath, “I miss you.”
“I miss you too baby girl, only about a week left.”
“I know, I know, I just, I want you now. You make this easier.”
“How is everything going?” Troy asked, I moved to my car and I got in, I pushed the button for the garage door to lift up. “Okay, I am getting pretty tired. Don’t you forget you have like two weeks worth of middle of the night wake-up calls.”
“When are we going to start weaning off breastfeeding?” Troy questioned, I sighed, “I don’t know. I am becoming conflicted.”
“I really love breastfeeding her and it is our quality time together.”
“Then don’t give it up,”
“But we are just so busy during the season, I would only really get to breastfeed her in the morning and before bed.”
“So what, can’t you do that?”
“I don’t know Troy, it’s not like I have done this before.”
“Call your LC and ask her. I am not a genius in this department.”
“Two feedings worth of breast milk and the rest of formula?”
“I think it could work,” I backed out of the garage and I shut the garage door. “I made it out,”
“Good, now, I think you should do that if you want. Hopefully those midnight feedings are coming to a close.”
“I agree. She is doing better but she is still not gaining a lot of weight.”
“Yea,” Troy was quiet for a moment and he sighed, “Do you know how much I don’t miss our times apart?”
“We were talking about that at our girl’s night,”
“Our time apart?”
“Senior year at NYU,” I corrected, Troy groaned, Troy wasn’t the biggest fan of that year. “I hated senior year,”
“You hated that ever male who knows anything about sports knew who I was,” Troy grumbled on the other end of the line. “That is probably the time I have felt most jealous in my entire life with you.”
“You were gone for like two weeks,”
“Lies! I spent all of November and December with my family and then I was gone for February-May,” I laughed, “Alright, I guess that was the year you spent the least amount of time there.”
Troy scowled from the other end of the phone, “I hated your senior year,”
“IT was my favorite year,” I said with a laugh, “Why?”
“My sexy fiancée was a big time baseball player, I had just finished my ESPN internship, my friends and I all lived in the same apartment building, and I was going to graduate and what was there not to love?”
“That was probably your happiest year of college,”
“Fine,” Troy grumbled, “I am still not a fan!”
“Everybody knew we were engaged,” I argued back, “So! They all looked at you like they were undressing you…” his voice was really low and I laughed, “Oh Bolton, you are something else.”
I pulled onto the highway, “I have to get ready for this signing. Are you on the highway?” I nodded even though he couldn’t see me, “I sure am.”
“Good. Have a good day at work okay?”
“I will…thank you.”
We hung up the phone and I turned my head slightly, the man had gotten me out of the house by just talking to me. His smooth voice made me forget for a simple couple of minutes that I was leaving my daughter behind with a stranger. He made it easier to get onto the highway and drive away even though now my insides tugged to hold her. Letting out a long breath, I wrapped my arms around the steering wheel as I drove.
Once I pulled into the view of Kauffman stadium leaving Logan behind became a little bit easier and the thrill of getting to do something baseball related took over. Pulling into a close parking spot I turned off my car ready to brave the winds of January. I grabbed my purse and my laptop bag from the backseat and quickly moved to the doors. The security guard pushed them open and I thanked him.
“How is the little girl?” he asked, I smiled, “Beautiful.”
“I can only imagine.”
Going to the elevators I went up to the top floor of the building and down the hallway. I heard the chatter of men and women all around as it was a big meeting today to go over final details. I had done a lot of corresponding through email since the beginning of planning but I wasn’t having nearly as much say this year and didn’t want to have as much say this year.
“Oh my god, are you sure you had a child?” Danni came over and I hugged her, “Hi,”
Casey grinned, “All of your post about Logan are adorable on Facebook.”
“Thanks you guys,”
More people began to greet me and I hugged each and every one of them. I chitchatted for a little bit until the meeting was called to order. I sat down next to Casey and Danni while we all whispered about the coming months of being together again. “I would love to welcome Gabi back to our group after spending almost three months away with her beautiful daughter.”
“Thank you,” my cheeks turned crimson but I nodded my head, “When will she be three months old?”
“On the fifth,”
“Right our FanFest,”
“How fun,” I nodded my head again while I began to doodle on the notepad in front of me as we began to discuss how many of the boys were coming this year, what needed to be done, blah, blah, blah. I mostly tuned things out until I heard my name being called. “Gabi,” I looked up, “You said you would oversee set up?” I nodded my head, “I will. Is that okay?”
“Yes, you and Danni will do it together. A couple of other people will be there as well.” I nodded, “Logan will be with me for any of whom would like to see her. I wanted to be with her.”
“Yay!” Danni cheered next to me and I laughed, “She will be excited for everybody to want to hold her all day.”
The group laughed while we continued to talk about things, the food we would have and all of this entire junk. Once we were done people began to get up and I decided I was going to go to my office for a little bit to get caught up on work before my afternoon meeting with Joel, Casey, and Danni. Walking to my office, I unlocked it with my keys dumping stuff onto the chair in front.
I pulled out my new picture frames as I set them on my desk. It was pictures of Logan and I with Troy. I smiled looking at all of them, my sweet girl staring back at me with her big beautiful eyes. Taking a deep breath, I logged onto my Mac while I picked up my cell phone to call Alyssa to see how her end was going. It rang four times and she picked up the phone, “Hi!”
“Hi, how is everything?” I asked while I clicked open my email. “Perfect! She is currently taking a nap.”
“Good, good, how long was she up between naps?”
“About two and half hours.”
“Awesome, I have another meeting this afternoon and then I will be home.”
“No worries. We are good here.”
I hung up with her as I began to go through my emails; a knock came at my door with Danni. “Do you need anything done?”
“No, I am just going through my email until Joel gets here.”
“Got it. How is the precious girl?”
“Fantastic. She misses her daddy though,”
“Is she fussy?”
“A little bit. She normally lays with both of us before she goes to sleep and she doesn’t have any of that right now making her angry.”
“Awh, she has to be the complete sweetest.”
“She is.” I picked up my phone and I handed it to her, “You can scroll through the pictures of her. Adorable.”
“Hey, Alyssa, do you mind if I come back in about an hour or do you need to be somewhere?”
“I am fine! If you need to finish you can. Don’t worry,”
“Are you sure? If you have plans I don’t want to ruin them. You were only supposed to work until five.”
“I just have to be somewhere at seven,”
“I will be home by six fifteen then,”
“Fantastic. Logan will be happy!”
I smiled as I hung up shortly after as I entered the bar that Ellie and Chase were inside of. Stepping into the bar the smell of smoke wafted out of the building, rushing past me to the clean oxygen. Pushing inside of the bar I found them both sitting at a high-top drinking a beer. “Gabi!” I waved as I walked closer to them. Easing a bar stool up to the high top. “Hey guys,”
“Do you want a drink?”
“No, I have to go home and feed Logan.”
“Yea, I can’t stay long because of the nanny who is watching her right now. I just wanted to stop in and say hello,”
“Hello,” Chase said with a wave, I smiled, “Hello,”
“When does Troy get home?”
“A week from Sunday,”
“This feels like forever.”
“I know right? Logan is ready for him to be home.”
“Forever and Always,”
“How was work today?” Chase asked, “Meetings, I can’t wait for baseball to start again. Then I will be alright,”
“Well if it makes you feel better I am going to drown my sorrows with Jack because my client is a fucking idiot,” Ellie rubbed Chase’s shoulders gently while she leaned against him, “It is just one case Chase,”
“So it is going to be a loss because he is a jackass.”
Ellie sighed giving me a look, “I love my bookstore.”
“I love my boys,”
Ellie smiled, “How is Miss. Princess?”
“Probably ready for me to be home. I haven’t been home since ten and I frankly miss her.”
“I bet. That is a long time for you.”
“Yea, I think it is time to start weaning her off of my milk during the day and just morning and night.”
“Wow, such interesting conversation.” Chase mumbled, Ellie laughed, “She is speaking her mind right now. She has nobody to talk to at home.” I laughed, “I can keep that conversation for Troy tonight.”
“Oh God, is that what your conversations become?” Chase asked, “Among other things.” I said with a laugh, “Plenty of sexy talk.”
“Good. As long as that doesn’t disappear.”
“The day that disappears from the Bolton’s is the day we are ALL in trouble.” Chase and I laughed, “If that happens then I will let you guys know but right now it hasn’t so you guys are okay.” Ellie smiled as the bartender brought over another round of drinks to them. The couple thanked them while we chit chatted for a little bit.
“Are you guys going to come to Spring Training this year?”
“Maybe. Depends on Chase’s caseload.”
“Well you know the drill,”
I smiled gently, “I better get going. I told Alyssa I would be home by 6:15.”
“Better get going.” I nodded as I scooted off the barstool. “I’ll see you guys later.” I hugged Ellie and she squeezed me tightly back. Picking up my purse I made it to the exit and back to my car just down the street.
Sliding onto my seats, my car hummed to life with a push of the button. I twisted the handle to let the hot air blast in the car. I pulled out into the street as I drove the side roads all the way back to our house. I yawned deeply as the sun was beginning to set in the sky and I wondered where Alyssa could be going as she was still young and had a social life of sorts.
Once our big house came into view, my car pulled over the edges of the driveway and towards the garage. My fingers touched the garage remote and the door propped open. Putting my car into the garage and then into park. I smiled grabbing all of my bags and shutting the garage. Opening the door I heard her tiny voice coming from the living room. It was full of squeals and little three-month old noises.
I laid my bag down onto the counter while I went into the living room. Alyssa was playing with Logan on the floor, Logan was all giggles and I smiled softly. I moved on the hardwood with my heels, Alyssa turned around with a smile, “Hi,”
“Hey,” she smiled softly as she picked up Logan off the floor and came over to me. I smiled, “There is my princess! How are you sweet girl?” I took her from Alyssa and I kissed on her face. She squealed with delight and my smile beamed, “You are so beautiful,”
I paid Alyssa and she waved good-bye. Right now we were paying her on a need to need basis but once the season started she would get paid every two weeks. “Did you have a good day?” she snuggled into my chest and I reached for my phone to call Troy. It rang twice and then he picked up, “Hey baby,”
“Hi,” I sat down on the couch while I kicked off my heels, “How are you?”
“I’m good. My hand is sore but besides that I miss you and Lolo,”
“She misses you too.”
“Do you miss me?”
He smiled, “Good, anyways, how was your day at work?”
“Good, good, FanFest is going to be a bunch of fun as usual and then I went to hand with Ellie and Chase at the bar for a bit.”
“When was the last time we were at the bar?”
“Before Logan was born.”
“Wow, that was so long ago.”
I laughed, “Something like that,”
“How is Logan?”
“Just laying in my arms right now, listening to me talk to you,”
“Okay, one second,” I pulled my phone away and pressed the button, I sat Logan up against me and propped my feet up. Troy’s picture popped up seconds later with his Royals hat on backwards, a black t-shirt against his tan skin. “Look at my girls!”
Logan squealed at the sound of Troy’s voice, Troy’s face light up, “There is my Lolo,” I smiled and she kicked her legs out in response, she was definitely starting to develop a personality and I was loving every minute of it. She put her fingers to her mouth, “She is so beautiful Gabs,”
“Tell me about it,” I kissed the top of her head and he sighed, “You know it was bad when I had to be separated from you. I hated every single minute of it but now that there is two of you it is even worse. I just want to be home.”
“We have about a week left,”
“I know I need it to hurry up.” I rubbed Logan’s leg, “Hey, I looked into it and many women just breastfeed their babies in the morning and at night with formula in-between. I say we start that here shortly or at least start mixing in bottles of formula.”
“We can call her Peds office and see what the recommend for her.”
“I like it, that means I still get to do that with her and then not have to worry about pumping and stuff.”
“Our conversations have done a 180,” Troy’s laughs made me smile as his cheeks crunched up in the corners, his eyes glowing with a bit of happiness. “Gotta love the magic of kids,”
“You’re looking a little tired Brie,” my eyes surveyed him as he seemed to be completely rested up on sleep, youthful again, “I’m pretty tired. Somebody decided to wake up twice last night.” I pinched her little foot and she kicked her legs at me again. Troy sighed, “I’m sorry. I wish I could be there.”
“I love you,”
“I love you too,” he smiled, “I have to go, we are eating dinner,”
“What, we were still waiting on our food. I promise, I am not being rude. I just need to go.”
“Have fun, Ill talk to you tomorrow.”
“You got it,”
“Bye girls, bye Lolo,” Logan started to cry as if she actually understood what he meant. Troy’s picture disappeared and she cried more. “I know big girl, you just want daddy to stay.” I hugged her and rubbed her back until her voice changed to hiccups. “C’mon sweet girl, let’s go take a bath and then we can change into our PJ’s.”
Tuesday, January 28th, 2020 – 3:30 AM
I woke up and felt like I was in a story about hell. I got up from the bed and I went running for the bathroom as I leaned over the toilet spilling last nights dinner out. My stomach bubbled and I was freezing. I gripped the toilet in front of me bracing for any more vomiting to occur.
I had been coughing for a couple of days now but now I could hardly breathe and my head was pounding within my skull. Pushing off the toilet I flushed it and washed my face. My face felt feverish so I grabbed the thermometer from the cabinet as I could barely keep my eyes open. Once the machine beeped I pulled it away to see I had a fever of 102.3.
Another round of coughing hit my chest, I felt like my lungs were going to explode out of my chest. Bracing myself to the bed, I laid back down hoping that I was going to be okay enough to sleep in my bed and not vomit everywhere.
Once my head hit the pillow, Logan’s cry rang through the room. I curled up onto my side in agony from how sore my body was, from doing nothing, and now I wasn’t sure I was going to get out of bed again.
Where the fuck was Troy.
Pushing out of the bed, I stumbled out of the room and into Logan’s. She had broken out of her swaddle and probably also wanted to eat. I picked her up and I dragged her rocker into my room. I set her little rocker up as I crawled back into bed with her.
She quickly started to eat once I allowed her access and she went to town. I bit my lip trying to fight back any amount of nausea that was coming my way. I picked up my phone because I needed somebody to talk too or I was going to fall asleep with Logan on my chest. It only rang two times before he picked up.
His sleepy voice normally made my inside melt but tonight I just wanted to cry, “No,” Troy was silent because he rarely heard no to that question, “What’s wrong, is Logan okay?”
“She is perfectly fine,”
“You sound stuffy,”
“I am. I woke up and had to vomit and I have a fever. All I want to do is sleep but she wants to eat and if I don’t talk to somebody I am going to fall asleep with her on my chest and- “
“Brie, hey, slow down a little bit. Are you okay?”
“I feel like somebody ran me over with a truck while I was sleeping.”
“Do you need me to come home?”
“You can’t just come home Troy,”
“If you need me I can come home.”
“Right now I need somebody to talk to so I don’t fall asleep.”
“If you are sick you are going to need your own rest later today.”
“I’ll call my mom and have her watch Logan. She can stay here so I can continue to feed Logan throughout the day and I can sleep or whatever. I just need to get through this feeding.”
“You sound miserable,”
“I am,” I was on the verge of tears at this point, “I’m cold and tired,”
“Is Logan feeling okay?”
“Have you been feeling this way all week?”
“The cough started a couple of days ago but this started when I woke up,”
“I’m sorry baby girl,”
“It’s okay, you are working.”
“I don’t really want to talk anymore. Can you keep talking?”
Troy seemed to have talked about every single visit in the amount of time that Logan needed to eat. I burped her and swaddled her again as I laid her down into the rocker. She was already passed out once she settled into it. “I’m going to sleep now,” my voice was hoarse and Troy stopped talking for a moment, “Good, call me when you wake up okay?” I nodded into my pillow. “I will.”
“I love you Brie,”
“I love you too,”
Thursday, January 30th, 2020
I had been sicker than a dog the past two days – I was pretty sure I had never been sicker in my entire life than in these two days. My mom and dad had practically taken over everything and I had only really seen Logan when it was time for feedings and I hardly even remember those.
Curling on my side, I breathed in and out as today was the first day I felt slightly better. I didn’t want to vomit at the sight of food, my headache wasn’t really there, my sore throat was gone, and my fever was finally disappearing. It was paining Troy to talk to me everyday and not be able to help in anyway.
This would only happen because Troy was away; if he was home I wouldn’t have gotten sick at all. Taking a deep breath, I pushed up in the bed but I still felt slightly dizzy by this motion. My cough was still really rough and it hurt my body most of the time but that was still lingering.
A knock came at the door and I closed my eyes, hoping it wasn’t already time for another feeding for Logan. The door opened and then the bed moved, her fingers touched a piece of hair and she brushed it away from my face. “How are you feeling sweetie,” I looked up to see my mom and I shrugged, “I’m tired still but I am feeling better.”
“I need to go take care of the twins for a bit and your dad had a meeting. Do you want me to call somebody or do you want to just watch Logan?”
“I’ll take her. This is getting silly, I need to learn how to take care of my daughter and be sick.”
“You’ll normally have Troy for that Gabs, I would not have asked you yesterday. Do you even remember yesterday?”
“Vague moments, feeding Logan really,”
She smiled, “You were out of it yesterday.”
“I don’t think I have ever felt anymore sick than this,”
“The flu hit you hard,”
“It did. Is Logan okay?”
“Yes, happy as could be still.”
“Yea, I can take her. I’ll be fine,” I sat up in bed and I took a long drink of water. “Alright, we will stop by later to check on you okay?” I nodded as she went around getting Logan and probably whatever she needed. I flipped the TV on and she handed me Logan. “There is my sweet girl,” she pulled on a strand of my hair that was sitting in front of her. “Silly girl,”
I turned on Netflix and we began to watch a couple of different TV shows. Logan was in and out of sleep in my arms while I tried to stay awake but I battled sleep myself. She woke up again and turned her head to the TV, “I know, drama,” she turned to look back at me and I smiled, “I love you Lolo,”
I kissed her forehead and then eased her into the rocker next to me so she could get a solid nap in. I rubbed my own eyes and I rolled onto my side and was out within minutes.
Friday January 31st, 2020
I washed a dish and put it into the dishwasher. Troy was finally coming home this afternoon from his long trip. Next weekend we had FanFest and then we would be getting ready for Spring Training. I was only slightly feeling better than I was yesterday but was still a major improvement.
All I still wanted to do was fall asleep but I was making due. I sent my parents home and I took care of Logan all night by myself and was becoming a mom again. My headache had come back but mostly because I couldn’t stop coughing. Shutting the dishwasher, I started it and I wiped my hands off. I took a deep breath when I heard the garage door open. My heart raced a little bit because I really missed Troy and I realized how much this was a two-person job.
I felt for more single parents out in this world.
I didn’t move from my spot in the kitchen because I was too tired to move. My body hurt to move. Biting down on my lip the door opened and he looked up to see me. “There is my beautiful girl,” his face looked stressed and worn after the past couple of days we had both had I probably featured the same look.
Moving away from the counter I wrapped my arms around his waist breathing in his scent, “Hi,” I said softly, he picked me up and rested me onto the counter. “How are you feeling?”
“I am really tired but I am feeling a hell of a lot better than I did the other day.”
“Your mom said you were pretty out of it,” I nodded my head, “I barely remember anything.” He kissed my forehead gently, “Where is my baby girl?” he asked, “Right here,” I mumbled as I rested my head onto his shoulder. He laughed rubbing my back, “My other baby girl,”
“She is sleeping,”
“I am going to go see her.”
“No, don’t leave me. I missed you and I just want you to hold me.”
“I will hold both of my girls. Let’s piggy back.” I didn’t oppose as I wrapped my legs around his waist and I rested my head onto his shoulder. My arms wrapping around his neck while we walked down the hallway to her room.
Troy grinned as he spotted her, “There is my princess,” Troy picked her up letting go of my legs so I wrapped those around his legs to hold on tighter. He walked across the hall to our room where he sat down on the bed allowing me to just fall backwards and for him to scoot backwards to rest back.
“You do not understand how much I missed my bed.”
“I bet. I missed you next to me,”
“Agreed,” I laid my head down into his lap and I let my eyes close. “I love you,”
“I love you too. It is time for you to rest now,”
“No, thank you for being a saint,”
I giggled and I squeezed his knee, “Forever. “
Happy Tuesday! Sorry about how late the update is but it is here! My computer was being all funny again so I gave it a 48 hour break and it is working wonderfully now! Yay! I know I will not be able to update next week. It is finals week and I just won’t have the time to write this week. You’ll get an update after Christmas! Wow! I can’t believe Christmas is coming so quick!
I hope you guys have a fabulous holiday!